It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
how do you play pong handcuffed?
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
