she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
