So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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