The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
