so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
