i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Where are you guys?
Drunk
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
