I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Houston, we have a blender
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
