Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
