I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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