i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
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He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
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I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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