Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize