Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
