i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
