So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Randomize
