I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
She's the barista slut.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
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