I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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