I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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