hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
