If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize