I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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