I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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