Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
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