Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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