He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
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Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
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Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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