I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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