you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
