Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Are we in a gay sports bar?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize