Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Randomize
