i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
