I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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