the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
