i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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