did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey