my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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