Christians are straight up FREAKS
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize