we have pet lesbian snakes
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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