Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
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I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
dude. I can hear the air.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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