just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize