Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Just pee around me
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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