Do vagina's smell?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize