I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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