Sorry, I don't speak sober.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
