tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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