I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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