It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
