Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
