Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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