I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
love makes seman taste better
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize