so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
