Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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